The Big M

Not to be confused with 'Super M' (the milkshake), 'The Big M' is Montreal, the biggest city in Quebec. I was invited to attend a workshop there last week and jumped at the opportunity. It was my first time in a big city in Canada (St. John's is only about the size of George) and although I was only there for a short time I saw enough to want to go back for a longer visit.

Those of you who read my last entry will have heard about the disappointing start this trip got off to. I was gutted to have to watch the NHL game between Montreal and Toronto on TV instead of at the Bell Centre, particularly as it turned out to be a cracker game. In the build up to the game it was described as the greatest rivalry in Canadian sport. Both sides were desperate for points to make the playoffs so there was a lot at stake. In the end Montreal ran out 5-4 winners in a game played at a really high tempo (and temper) with lots of physicality in front of a sell out crowd. All I got out of it was some good karma - when I phoned the hotel to tell them I was arriving late I told them to give my ticket to anyone in the staff who wanted it. I will now take this up with Air Canada who have made "The List" of hated companies (if you have an option of flying Air Canada or any other airline in the world, take the other one).


OK, I’ve had my bitch session, now back to the trip. I had heard that Montreal has been described as the most European of the North American cities. I was staying in the Old City and there definitely is a distinctive European feel to the place: narrow streets (some cobbled), old buildings, lots of statues, elaborate churches (the Notre Dame Basilica), and everyone speaking French. The St Lawrence River flows though the city and I could tell that in the summertime it must be incredibly beautiful. It’s still impressive in the winter though and I had a good look around the Old City in the first few days. Like a lot of the larger European cities, Montreal is also very cosmopolitan (particularly compared to St. John’s). There are people from all over and it has a Latin Quarter and a Chinese Quarter as well. My hotel was pretty close to Chinatown and I got some great food there (more on that later). I was also approached by a Chinese hooker in the Red Light district just on the other side of Chinatown. I had been walking around taking photos, looking like a real tourist (which I was, so I had the right). Naively, I didn’t even realize I had stumbled into the Red Light district, even though I had just taken a photograph of a dodgy character walking down the pavement through a path of red lights.
“Are you alone?”
“Yes I am.” Pause, realisation hits in. “But I’m not looking for anyone at the moment.”
“Ahh, are you sure?”
“Yes”
“Do you have a cigarette then?”
“No.”
I could tell she was disappointed, and not just because of the money and the cigarette. The joys of the big city!

The workshop itself was poor. And this is me being polite. The goal was to set conservation priorities for the estuary and Gulf of St Lawrence large ocean management area (LOMA). It was run by the Oceans division of DFO (I am a part of the Science division) and it seemed as though they were trying to achieve their goals in the least scientific way possible: no analysis of data, rather just gathering “experts” to discuss what they thought was best. Given that I was invited and I don’t know a damn thing about the Gulf of St Lawrence, there were obviously a few flaws in their “expert” approach. They also failed to adequately and clearly define how the decision process was to be undertaken. Basically, it was like throwing a bunch of headless chickens into a room and hoping that they would end up in a straight line – we all had the legs and wings to move around and make a big noise, but nobody really new what the hell they were doing (or rather there was no consensus at all on what we were doing).

So the days spent at the workshop were tedious and irritating, particularly because the weather outside was clear and sunny and unseasonably warm for Montreal (warmer than -10C). Then a blizzard hit, the night before the one day that I had off to explore the city. The snow carried on into the next day so walking around above ground wasn’t an option. So I caught the subway into the downtown area. Montreal has a nice subway system, a lot smaller than the London underground obviously, and it wasn’t hard to find my way around using it. I was very happy with a photo I took of the train arriving at one of the stations (note how you can see the people on the opposite platform 'through' the train).

When I stop to think about it, I suppose at first glance I'm not the best person to travel with. Not only do the Air Travel Gods seem to constantly piss in my drink, but I have a knack at getting lost when all odds are against it. I have been lost in all major cities in South Africa (except Bloem, because I've never really spent much time there) and I have now been lost in the only two cities I have been to in Canada. To make things worse, both of the times I have been lost in St. John's and Montreal were during snow storms. This adds a new dimension to the confusion. Everything looks different in the snow and its hard to spot clear landmarks. Also when you're (hopefully) wrapped up in many layers with your hood right down over you face like Kenny in South Park its hard to gather your bearings and just have a good look around. The downtown area of Montreal has 38km of underground malls and I couldn't for the life of me find an entrance to any part of this. After stumbling about in the snow for half an hour I eventually found one. Later I found out that I could have connected straight from my subway station into the mall network. But while at first glance I appear to be a jinxed traveller, it must be noted that my unrivalled experience in dealing with airline cock-ups and knowing how to cope when lost actually makes me the ideal, panic-free travel companion.

So anyway, the 38km of shopping and eating areas is divided up among various levels and sub-malls. You can pretty much cross the whole city centre under there. It was nice, and fairly impressive, but they’re just shops after all and I got a little bored getting lost amongst the plethora of retail outlets. I surfaced for air occasionally and above ground the snow was piling up. Parking your car in this weather appears to be risky business and I saw a few guys stuck in the snow and plenty more trying audacious moves to park in foot-deep snow.

The food in Montreal was very good. My hotel had an excellent breakfast, my favourite part of which was the make your own waffles section. I also had some really good paninis, Vietnamese food and Bison steak (at a Jazz venue in town – Montreal is famous for its Jazz) but three items in particular were noteworthy. Firstly, I had one (well, five) of the best crème brûlées I have ever had from a little bistro near the workshop venue. Secondly, I had a vietnamese drink (can’t remember what it was called) that I had to ask the guy if it actually was a beverage when I ordered it. It was red beans, tapioca and tofu topped with crushed ice and coconut milk. Sounds weird I know, but very refreshing and surprisingly good. Lastly, the famous Montreal Smoked Meat sandwich. I had had these before at Montreal Airport at a pub called Moe’s (seriously) where it was their speciality, but I didn’t realise it was a citywide speciality. Basically its just bread (homemade) with mustard, an unfeasibly large amount of smoked beef and a pickle on the side. Now I’ve had many sandwiches in the past, bought and made, but I have never had this much meat on one sandwich. The meat layer is literally about three times as thick as the two slices of bread together. Fantastic. Not for vegetarians.

Well that’s it for Montreal. I will definitely go back someday (maybe actually catch an NHL game this time) and from what I saw I think it’s a must for any tourist in Canada. I have posted more pictures on my flickr site (just click the link with all the pictures on the left). Oh by the way, my flight back to St. John's was only delayed by 5 hours, making it one of my more successful trips in recent time.